7 Crazy South Jersey NSFW Craigslist Items That Will Make You Blush

Quick! Turn around. Close the browser window. Hit the back button. Don't go any further.

We have found the worst of Craigslist!

At least we hope it's the worst. It can't possibly get any worse than this. Can it?

If you didn't notice the NSFW designation in the title, let m reiterate: NOT SAFE FOR WORK.

Actually, it's now safe for anything....

Don't say I didn't warn you.

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Here we go.

1. Used Sex Doll. ($500)

Really? Um, really?

The official description: "Used sex doll. 5'2 75lbs.. metal skeleton so can be moved into different positions. Text for pictures."

Hey, I don't mean to rain on anyone's parade, but doesn't the "USED" part bother you at all?

Hold on, I really need to go wash my hands now. My eyes, too.

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2. Hot Selling148cm Upgraded Version Full Body Silicone Artificial Human - $806

Silicone. Oh.

Description: "Fetish Silicone Love Doll, brought to you by the Artists at Fun Fantasy Dolls Sex Dolls Your Custom Made Silicone Wife will RIVAL the EXPENSIVE, OVER RATED REAL DOLL. Multi-Speed, Wireless, Automatic, Latex-Free Material Silicone, Metal, Nylon, ABS. Text me anytime!!!!!!"

I have ABS on my car. Anti-lock braking system. Is this the same thing?

I have no comment, but I need to wash my hands and eye again.

3. Pics ;) - $20

This appears to be a real person. You don't get her, though.

Description: 25 year old skinny white female selling nude photos and sex videos. I take the photos how you want and I make the videos how you want as well. Or, Ok cc an just send a video on I already he ave made. Pics are 5 for $20 and videos are 2 for $50
NO MEETUPS!

Hey, now....

I guess we all have our own side hustles, right?

4. Tantra chair - $100

Is this homemade?

Description: Tantra chair; Known as "sex chair"; Yoga; Adult positioning chair; Wooden.

Does the plant come with it?

I swear I saw this at IKEA last weekend!

5.Adult dvds videos/magazines - $1,750

$1750! Holy Moly!

Description: Price drop. Make a serious offer! (There actually is a lot more to the description.

Let's talk turkey here. How many do you need? $1750!

6 & 7: Hookup Service.

OMG! I'm not providing photos, links, or actual descriptions here, other than this: I easily found 2 females offering to provide certain selective services for consenting adults. The thing is, both were offering almost identical services, but one had her price set at $100, the other at $1,000.

Either one is undervaluing herself or the other is overvaluing herself. OR, it's just truth in pricing. I have no further comment.

8. Sex Machine - $80

"Motorized machine to stimulate."

At least it's in "excellent" condition... It certainly looks pretty clean.

That's it, I'm done. I need to go wash my hands again.