Shoobie Alert! 6 Ways To Identify A Shoobie At The Jersey Shore
Who's excited for summer? At this point in the year, you won't find too many hands not raised when asked that question.
It's about that time when everybody wants to forget about their problems, throw on their bathing suits, and hit the beach down at the Jersey shore. Tourists will be flooding the Jersey coastline with their trucks and minivans to enjoy their time off by the beach. You and I both know them well. We call these out-of-towners shoobies.
Now, not everybody that's from out of town choosing to come to spend time at the beach is a shoobie, but nine times out of ten, they do possess some shoobie-like qualities. To figure out whether or not you'd qualify as a shoobie, take a look at the list of six qualities of a shoobie to see if you're a total shoob or locally acceptable.
Your car is fully packed.
When you head down to the "shore," or beach as the locals say, do you and your kids barely have any room to move in the car? Do you bring 3 coolers, all the bikes, boogie boards, skim boards, and sand toys with you to the beach? What about a giant canopy for the fam? Spoiler alert: you might be a shoobie.
You feed the seagulls.
Now listen and listen good; no local would EVER think it's funny to get close to these rats with wings, let alone feed them so a whole flock of them gathers by your umbrella. If you think it's comical to feed the seagulls, there's a good chance you're a shoob. I don't make the rules.
You bring a giant beach cart with you to and from the beach.
Remember when I said shoobies pack their cars to the gills for a beach day? Well, they need something to that'll get that junk onto the beach, don't they?
You blast your music really loud.
Listen, nobody's against you having a good time. But, if your music is so loud that it can be heard from the water, then maybe you should turn it down a little..... shoobie.
You wear jean shorts on the beach.
While it's true that not everybody loves the idea of donning a bathing suit on the beach, just don't wear jean shorts as a substitute. Guys, you couldn't have just rocked a pair of basketball shorts?
You wear sandals with socks.
I don't care what the kids are doing these days. When I say "kids," I mean 21 and under. I get that socks with slide flip flops are in right now. That's all well and good. On the beach, however, that's still a no-no. Hard flag there, my friend. DO NOT WEAR SOCKS ON THE BEACH. It's basically the golden rule of the entire Jersey shore.
Again, I don't make the rules. I'm just the messenger. Only YOU know whether or not you'd qualify as a shoobie, through and through. If you can check off all six of these, though, we all know you're one, too.